Did you know it takes courage to be vulnerable? It really does. Just because you love Jesus doesn’t mean you are vulnerable – that is a daily life choice that must be learned and pursued.
What Does it Mean to Be Vulnerable?
According to Webster’s Dictionary, vulnerable comes from the Latin noun vulnus -which means wound and once referred to having the capability of being physically wounded. Today, the connotation of being vulnerable, is to be defenseless to either physical or verbal attacks.
Let me quickly say, lest there be any misunderstanding, I do not advocate letting others walk on you, take advantage of, or abuse you. This is not humility, it is to become a victim and that is never okay!
Here’s the bottom line.
You are a treasure of great worth and God wants you to be treated with respect.
You were created in the image of the Lord – not in the image of a doormat! You are a person of dignity and great value. No one ever has the right to use you for their own purposes, mock you, or wound you physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually.
If you are in a situation where someone is hurting you – please get help.
You are a treasure of great worth and God wants you to be treated with respect.
Let me break this down for you.
The vulnerability I speak of is completely different. It occurs within the context of safety found in the Lord Jesus. With intentionality, while hidden in Him, you open yourself to allow His beauty to touch your heart.
Learn to Know Yourself, First
Give yourself permission to be curious and aware of what emotions your body is feeling.
Become a student of yourself.
- What is your favorite flavor?
- What’s your favorite color?
- What helps you relax?
- What stretches you and helps you think more clearly?
- What food makes you smile?
- What makes your heart sing?
- What exercise do you prefer: walking, running, swimming, tennis, golf, …?
Learning to know yourself, your likes and dislikes, will help you become sensitive to your desires and needs in a way that honors you and the Lord.
As you pay attention to your heart’s deepest desire you will grow sensitive to the voice of the Holy Spirit and responsive to His touch.
Learning to know yourself, your likes and dislikes, will help you become sensitive to your desires and needs in a way that honors you and the Lord.
Dear Heart, it is good to allow yourself freedom to feel and express the desires of your heart before the Lord.
Again, to avoid confusion – I’m not talking about desire that allows you to violate any of God’s commands or move in selfishness. That kind of desire is where you take what you want or feel you are owed something. This moves you out of the boundary of God’s plan for your life and arises from the kingdom of darkness. That kind of desire is never legitimate.
Why Is It So Hard to Be Vulnerable?
Good desire is often corrupted during childhood when abuse or loss teaches the brain it is not safe to need or to be vulnerable. To survive, the brain throws you into shutdown and withdrawal. As that happens, you move into self-protection. The need to avoid pain and feel safe makes it feel dangerous to be vulnerable. Closing yourself to feeling pain shuts down the ability to discern needs and desires.
Self-protection feels good and becomes addictive. But like any addictive substance, it deceives and lulls into feeling false comfort and false safety. When this happens you will be unaware of the lies you believe as truth, which make you vulnerable in a way that is not healthy.
So, What Can A Person Do?
Run to the Name of Jesus. Let Him be your strong tower, your safe harbor in the midst of the storm.
Inner healing begins with the Word of God. Psalm 19 is a beautiful psalm to meditate on and sing, for it teaches us about a holy desire, the desire for the Lord and His words. Take a moment to listen to the song, enjoy its beauty and ask the Lord to help you learn to desire Him above all else.