Transformative Blog
Weekly blogs to help you find healing, hope, and freedom
What Do You Do When You Are So Depressed You Want to Die?
Celebration The year ended with a delightful trip to Trafalgar Square with friends to celebrate New Years. In order to catch the last train home, we left the busy thoroughfare where hundreds of people still celebrated and took a shortcut down a deserted street. ...
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Negative Thoughts Have a Huge Impact: A Powerful Way to Escape Negativity’s Trap
Negative Thoughts Did you know negative thoughts: Produce a harvest of bad things Bring about the things you dread Produce negative words Cause harm to your body Hold the power of death Bring a curse on you and your loved ones I grew up believing I didn't deserve to...
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5 Simple Keys to Trauma Recovery
Trauma is real. While medical journals say there’s no cure, you have power to move out of victimization by choosing life. If you live in the present and take specific steps to retrain your brain, you will experience resurrection power setting you free from the past....
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Is It Possible to Recover from Trauma?
Trauma creates overwhelming feelings of being out of control. You feel helpless. You experience feelings of being smothered, where you desperately work to find breath to survive. You struggle to cope, unable to find words to describe your constant sense of danger or...
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How to Overcome Limiting Beliefs and Our Desire for Safety
If you've experienced trauma, you've been thrown off balance. Feeling threatened, instinctively you try to hide. Where possible, you run away - even if only in your mind. But you have the power to learn how to overcome limiting beliefs that immobilize you in your...
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You are Not Covered in Shame
Overcoming Limiting Beliefs It’s crazy how often we think God is being mean or unfair to us, that He finds pleasure in watching us squirm and struggle. But isn't true! God hates evil. He doesn’t hate you. He's not angry with you but He is angry about sin done against...
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The Guts and Glory of Forgiveness
Find Healing Through Forgiveness The greatest and most arduous adventures of life I have embarked upon are the mountains of forgiveness. The journey is fraught with perils and difficulty. But each time I reach a pinnacle - the vista is gorgeous. My heart is filled...
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Find Spiritual Healing Through Self-Forgiveness
Do you strive for perfection but always come up a bit short? Feeling like a failure is depressing. I used to believe I was a failure. I thought self-forgiveness was for others, not for me. Deep inside I felt I didn't deserve to be forgiven. I also felt I could never...
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Orphans and Street Children in Mongolia
God Has A Good Plan Years ago, I longed to go to Mongolia but the Lord never took me there. Mongolia is the second largest landlocked country in the world and is located between Russia and China. For 70 years the Soviets occupied the country but today Mongolia is a...
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7 Steps to Freedom Through Forgiveness
Do you long for freedom? Freedom isn’t a given in life. If you don’t take active steps to overcome your chains, you will remain a slave to the past. Let’s look at 7 steps to freedom through forgiveness. When You Bury the Past “You stupid idiot. Can’t you do anything...
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Rise of the Servant Kings: What the Bible Says About Being A Man
In a day of the feminization of men, confusion about the relationship between a husband and his wife, increasing domestic violence, along with the rise of absentee fathers and children struggling with addictions, Rise of the Servant Kings: What the Bible Says About...
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Loving the Fatherless: Interview with Brent Wernsing
Loving the Fatherless What does loving the fatherless mean? The Apostle James said pure religion is to open your eyes and see the fatherless, to care for them, protect them, and help them (James 1:27). Sometimes love is demonstrated just by being with the child,...
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Overcoming the Father Wound and Past Trauma: Interview with Fred Kornis
The Father Wound I had the joy of interviewing Fred Kornis, who has been an evangelist for 45 years. I first met him in the early 1980’s as he taught a few of us some rope tricks to use in street evangelism. Fred has walked through many kinds of trauma; some of the...
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You Don’t Have to Earn God’s Love
The wonderful truth that took me years to learn is you don’t have to earn God’s love or forgiveness! Also, the Heavenly Father loves us to celebrate freedom. Did you know God likes numbers? He had Israel organize life into groups of 7. In the 49th year, which is 7...
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How You Can Experience Freedom From Curses
Words have power to bless or to curse others. The words you speak over yourself have the same power. Negative words bring limitations, insecurity, torment, illness, and even death. The joyful news is there is freedom from every curse. Prepare to Die I was in seventh...
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How Servant Leadership Saved My Life
When I was seven, I nearly drowned. As I wrote this story, I realized my brother exemplified servant leadership. Lea is my hero. His example teaches us how being present in the moment and envisaging the end result will help us move with thoughtfulness and clarity. The...
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A Love Letter to Hurting or Struggling Moms
Dear Mom, You may be a mom whose heart is breaking. You might struggle with exhaustion from caring for a mentally challenged, special needs, or very ill child. Perhaps you lost your child to death or your child was physically taken from you. Your anguish may be...
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What Does Bringing Up the Past Have to Do With Mental Health?
Some people believe bringing up the past is like digging up bones. Fascinating! Some Christians believe to speak of unresolved issues from the past shows lack of faith, is irrelevant because we are new creations in Christ, or feel it’s flat out sin. If you didn't...
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Why Verbal Affirmations Don’t Help You Stand Strong
It is wise to daily speak words of affirmation over yourself. It is especially important to speak words of life if you have the habit of thinking or speaking negative and even insulting words about yourself. One Problem The wonderful affirmations may momentarily make...
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How To Find a Secure Hope
In what do you place your hope? Perhaps it's success. A great career. Making a fortune. Being loved or having children. If it is something transient, you have placed your hope in something false that can crash and burn. In my thirties, I felt full of hope. Married,...
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How To Rebuild A Strong Boundary To Keep You Safe
Sometimes life tears down the boundary fences that keep out danger. Unless we are proactive and rebuild a healthy fence, we won’t feel safe or find courage to embrace the abundant life. When I moved to Nebraska, my life was in shambles. In the midst of some difficult...
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4 Things Abuse Teaches and How To Overcome the Victim Mindset
Abuse and the Victim Mindset Abuse is a teacher that lays a foundation of lies and limiting beliefs. Those beliefs control your thoughts, cause you to self-reject, teach you to be a victim, and dictate all your reactions. Abuse is powerful. There's good news! You have...
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Signs a Relationship is Becoming Toxic
If you are in a relationship where you're not accepted for who you are; you aren't treated with respect; your boundaries are ignored; you are being manipulated, mocked, humiliated, and even victimized – you need to know – the Lord doesn’t approve of what is happening....
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What is Abuse and Why Do We Avoid Talking About It?
It’s uncomfortable to talk about abuse. It takes courage to name the abuse and to speak the truth about what happened.
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Abuse Doesn’t Have the Authority to Shape Your Identity
Power Vs. Authority Abuse has power to shape you but it doesn’t have authority to determine who you become. Abuse says you have no value. Tha's a lie. Abuse has no authority to tell you who you are. My dear friend, you are so much more than what happened to you. Are...
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It’s Ok To Be Where You Are
A Rescue Mission I want to share a secret. For you to get unstuck or be set free from whatever is holding you in bondage – you have to learn to be where you are – in the moment. And being present, it is important to be able to open your mouth and ask for help when...
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Transformation: What It Is and Isn’t
Transformation Have you ever wondered what transformation is about? Or pondered why it has become the buzzword among life coaches and public speakers? In Latin, trans means across or through and forma means to form. To transform means there is change that cuts across...
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In Honor of True Friendship
Loss of a True Friend On February 7th, 1979, my beloved child, Charissa died, a victim of SIDS. Since that day, many I loved have died. Tragically, the arch enemy cancer has stolen the lives of many of my friends and family, including my grandmother, Aunt Winnie, Aunt...
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When God Doesn’t Do What You Want
Each morning I go outside with a cup of hot water and walk barefoot through the grass to a little hill facing the woods behind my home. In the bright morning light and fresh air, I talk with the Lord. One morning I heard a noise in the undergrowth in front of me....
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Bird in a Cage
Depths of a Dungeon Sandy lay slumped against the dank wall in the dark cell, deep in a dungeon no one except her tormentor knew about. Her hair was straggly and tangled, her clothes torn and filthy, her heart irreparably broken. As she tried to change position, a...
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The Power of Trauma to Trap You In The Past
Trauma wields great power In the moment of impact – the impact of steel as a truck slammed into your car. The impact of a hand raised in violence. The impact of rape. The impact of early childhood trauma. The impact of any other type of violence leaves one powerless....
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Have You Given Yourself Permission to Grieve?
The loss of a parent is the loss of the past. The loss of a spouse is the lost of the present. The loss of a child is the loss of the future. In your loss, have you experienced this to be true? As I got into the car the other day to go to the market, I heard the last...
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6 Topics. 6 Videos. 9 Minutes.
Questions Over the last week, I've shared videos to Facebook on hot topics. Because some of you aren't on social media, I wanted to make sure you also had access to this content! I'm excited to share the videos with you, which were just uploaded to Vimeo. Each video...
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A Prayer for 2019 | Video Blog To Encourage You
Blessings of Peace Just as Jesus stilled the turbulent Galilean sea, may the Lord quiet your heart. In the midst of the turbulence, may Jesus be your peace. In this week's episode of 5 Minutes to Transformation, (which is under 3 minutes), I pray for you and speak a...
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Are You Stuck? My Top Tip for the New Year VLOG
Are You Feeling Stuck? If you’re wondering how to make 2019 great, you’ll love my top tip to start the New Year strong. This is my last blog for the year! I appreciate you for taking time to read or listen to what I share. The times you have also responded and shared...
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A Christmas Message | Video Blog
Dear Friend, Only 5 days until Christmas! Some of us love Christmas and experience great joy simply at the thought of that day. Others find it to be a lonely and difficult time of the year. No matter your situation or the struggles you face, may the wonder of Christ,...
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Did Jesus Celebrate Hanukkah? The Light of the World | Video Blog
Did Jesus Celebrate Hanukkah? Today I share in under 5 minutes what I learned during Hanukkah! I answer the question, "Did Jesus celebrate Hannukah?" and share some of the history behind the Festival of Dedication. Enjoy the vlog and let me know your thoughts. May the...
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Your Failures and Limitations Do Not Define You
It is easy to focus on a disability or limitation and allow that to become your identity. It is also easy to focus on failure or the failure of a person who rubs you the wrong way.
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May This Festival of Lights Bring Blessings Upon You and Your Loved Ones
God's Provision After the defilement of the Temple by Antiochus Epiphanes, Judah Maccabee led his people against their enemy. Triumphantly entering Jerusalem, he reclaimed the Temple; then purified it from the abomination and defilement of the Greek army. Originally,...
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Memories and Wishes for a Wonderful Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving is a day set aside to be thankful I grew up in Wisconsin. At Thanksgiving, churches happily decorated the altar with large pumpkins and colorful gourds. Corn stalks, a bale or two of hay, and colorful leaves reminded us of God’s faithfulness. The hard...
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Do You Ever Engage in Imaginary Conversations?
A World You Can Control Do you ever engage in imaginary conversations where you become a victim? I am sure you will quickly answer no. But if you are like most of humanity, then you regularly engage in such conversations. You know. The kind where you were walking down...
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Practical Steps to Forgiveness | How To Forgive Deeply Video Blog
How to Forgive Last week we talked about how to break the cycle of abuse. Even if you aren't in an abusive relationship, if you live on this earth, you will have experienced some kind of abuse. Unresolved abuse will set you up to feel like you are a victim. The first...
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You Can Break the Cycle of Abuse
Break the Cycle of Abuse If you have been victimized, you don’t believe you are worthy of respect. You probably don’t even respect yourself. This leads to a fairy tale mindset where you imagine scenarios where someone comes and rescues you. Living in your imagination...
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How To Overcome Perfectionism
Perfect You don’t have to be perfect. I know you don’t believe me. I didn’t believe it either. That was before I learned how to overcome perfectionism. As a child I desperately tried to be perfect. Longing for affirmation, I modeled my behavior by what I had heard...
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Just Breathe: Keys to Regulate Reactive Behavior
Extra Notes As you take time to just breathe, it down-regulates your amygdala and enables you to move out of the reactivity of the reptilian brain that yells danger. Exhaling through your nose switches you into the thoughtfulness and cognitive functioning of your...
read moreAbout Barbara
Restoring dignity and hope to trauma survivors.
As a trauma survivor, Barbara finds joy in helping people experience healing and spiritual restoration.
